Finding Your Purpose as a Mom (Part 2)

In my life, questions like. . .What am I doing? Why am I here on earth? Am I making a difference in my life? Does what I do matter? What does this life mean?. . . have often plagued my thoughts...Click here to read Part 1 of this series.

At Bible Study one morning we were talking about the importance of serving. There was a mom there that had two young girls. She was so discouraged because she didn’t feel like she was doing her part. She said she felt like she was on the side-lines of the big game. . .watching. . .not doing her part. I could relate. How is being at home with my girls part of the game?

We are in the game! We are the forward, the quarterback, the point guard, and the coach. We don’t get rest. Our children are our service and we are specifically called to minister to them. Just because you aren’t in the jungles of Africa doesn’t mean you aren't serving.

Take this quote to heart…

"…the investment I made in my children’s lives did (and does) matter. Parenting isn’t just my responsibility, it is one of my God-ordained roles in life…Mothering is an anointed role. Don’t beg for distractions. Instead, immerse yourself in the experiences of today. Value them and make the most of them. At the right time, God will lead you onward, and you will be able to see the importance of today’s ordinary tasks in the total scope of God’s purposes." (Katie Brazelton, Pathway to Purpose for Women)

How do we find our purpose as a Mom? Draw Close To God

Our God who loves us wants us to draw close to Him. Another book John Ortberg has written is God is Closer Than You Think. In this book, Ortberg talks about the greatest moment in your life. It may be a variety of different things- your wedding day, birth of your children, a goal that was met, a dream vacation, a moment of revelation but he offers a different suggestion…

“I believe that the greatest moment of your life is this moment right here...

Not because it’s pleasant or happy or easy, but because this moment is the only moment you’ve got. Every past moment is irretrievably gone. It’s never coming back. If you live there, you lose your life.

And the future is always out there somewhere. You can spend an eternity waiting for tomorrow, or worrying about tomorrow. If you live there, you likewise will lose your life.

This moment is God’s irreplaceable gift to you. Most of all, this is the moment that matters because this moment is where God is. If you are going to be with God at all, you must be with him now- in this moment.”

Practical Ways to Draw Close to God:

• School Day Questions- How are your kids doing in school? Each day when I pick my kids up from school, I ask them two questions: What was your favorite part? What was your least favorite part? These are great conversation starters and allow you to find out about your child's day.

• Saying I’m sorry- The other morning, Emma woke up late. She was playing around in her room instead of getting ready for school. I stormed in her room and told her to get busy because we had a schedule! This nonsense was going to throw off the whole day! After I left her room, I realized that I had not even said, “Good morning” to her even though when she saw me she had a smile on her sweet little face and said, “Hi Mama". I had to stop myself and think about what was really important. Here I was irritated because I thought she was starting the day all wrong, when I was the one who started the day all wrong. I went in her room and helped her finish getting ready. That was the most important thing I did all day. That 5 minutes that I spent with her helping her get ready. Later I apologized and told her that even Mommy's have things to work on.

• I’m giving you grace- God gives us grace, why don’t we give more of it? Why don’t we teach it to our kids? Instead of the deserved consequence, tell your child that you are giving them grace and explain why. It's a powerful lesson.

• Involve kids in your major decisions- Let them know to start praying about family decisions: a pending move, adopting, a new job, a new school, your dreams, your job or anything that has to do with the whole family. What a wonderful lesson and it helps make your kids feel involved.
  

Will you draw closer to God?

• Maybe you don’t love Him because you don’t know Him yet- so get to know Him by reading the Bible or going to church.

• Maybe you’ve known Him for a long time but can’t seem to hear His voice very well- rest before Him, stop talking while you’re praying and just listen.

• Maybe you’ve been hurt and you don’t really feel like you can come to Him- all it takes is one small step toward Him and a simple prayer of, “Help”.

• Maybe there is sin in your life that keeps you from Him, you don’t feel worthy of being close to Him- call out to Him and ask for forgiveness.
  

Whatever it may be, or however big or small- take a step of purpose today towards your Creator.

Come near to God and He will come near to you.
(James 4:8 NIV)

In the coming articles, I'm going to discuss the next step of finding your purpose as a mom. Plus more practical ways to fulfill your purpose as a mom. Stay tuned for Part 3!

©2009 All Rights Reserved Trina Loucks
www.myheartsdesireministries.com

Finding Your Purpose as a Mom (Part 1)

In my life, questions like. . .What am I doing? Why am I here on earth? Am I making a difference in my life? Does what I do matter? What does this life mean?. . . have often plagued my thoughts.

Recently I was reading an article from Family Circle called, “The Secret Life of the American Wife”. It stated that 61 percent of American wives would change something about their life if given the chance.

Here are the five top changes they’d make:
1. Get a higher-paying job
2. Marry a different man
3. Marry later in life
4. Have more kids
5. Have kids at an earlier age

Clearly these women had not accurately calculated the timing very carefully when they answered these questions! But I have noticed that when we get antsy with life, or feel like something is wrong (especially as women), we tend to want to change something. . .I need a new haircut, a new wardrobe, a new house, a new style, a new husband, more kids...

After college, I taught elementary and junior high school for seven years. After teaching kindergarten, I “retired” and then went to work for a Christian organization. This was probably one of the most challenging positions that I had ever had. This is where I learned how to pray for wisdom because I quickly learned that I had none! After struggling with what I felt like was “quitting the ministry”, I came home to be a full-time mom.

I can’t tell you how excited I was to come home after working two and sometimes three jobs at one time. I was thrilled to be home with my two sweet girls and had visions of grandeur for our time together. I was going to be the greatest mom ever. People were going to call me “SuperMom”. My house was going to be decorated as a house you would find in any posh magazine. Our meals were going to be nutritious, gourmet and beautiful to gaze upon. I was prepared to do crafts with my children and make homemade gifts for every holiday on the calendar. And of course my children were going to be model citizens- a model that all would admire. Not only did the novelty wear off in about three weeks but my house wasn’t clean (we were remodeling a 1934 house for five years); my meals consisted of pasta, chicken and quesadillas (they weren’t that great to look at either); we may have got one craft done- the rest are still sitting in my craft closet and my children were not model citizens. . .but that is another story entirely!

After a few months of cleaning, cooking, picking up and dropping off, I hit a wall. I remember distinctly sitting on my bed one morning and realizing that I had run out of dreams. I had spent my whole life preparing for the “next” thing. . .I got good grades in elementary school so I could get into the AP classes in High School. In High School I made sure I had a good G.P.A. and a well-rounded life so I could get into college. In college I took all the necessary classes to get a good job, I traveled the world and had many wonderful experiences, I got married and had two kids and I even had a white picket fence. I had been extremely blessed! So how in the world could I at age 32 run out of dreams? I felt like I had nothing to look forward to. Was this my life now? Cleaning, cooking and driving? This was what all my hard work was for? Was this all there was?

During this time, I was reading a book by John Ortberg called, If You Want to Walk on Water, You've Got to Get Out of the Boat. In the book Ortberg told a story of a gentleman who wanted to take his faith to the next level and decided to commit to a six-month prayer challenge. He was going to pray for one thing every day for sixth months. This inspired me to follow in his footsteps because I was desperate for change, a miracle. . .anything to help me in my purposelessness. I prayed everyday for six months for my calling, my purpose, so I could figure out what in the world God called me to do. It was the most amazing time and God spoke to me mightily.

In the coming articles, I'm going to discuss what God showed me. I know you will be blessed as we explore practical ways to fulfill your purpose as a mom. Stay tuned!

Delight yourself in the Lord And He will give you the desires of your heart. (Psalm 37; 4 NIV)

©2009 All Rights Reserved Trina Loucks
www.myheartsdesireministries.com